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My abusive ex-boyfriend is psycho and I need help.

Unread postPosted: Sun Mar 27, 2011 5:11 pm
by HealthForum
I am currently 19 years old and attending college. My ex-boyfriend and I of almost two years broke up after he called the cops on me a year from yesterday. During an argument he claimed I was being "physically abusive" and called the police on me. (I was in no way physically harming him.) The next week, he came into my lecture hall on our college campus and sang to me in front of all 200 other students in the class. I still did not forgive him, but four days after that, when I finally gave him a chance to talk to me. He looked through my phone without my knowing and confronted me about a boy that had text me. He then slapped me across the face, slamming my head into the tile bathroom wall. He dropped out of our college and moved back home. We are from the same town.

When I got home after that spring semester, I saw him at a party. He blamed me for everything, said I deserved what I got, and preceded to tell me if I didn't come over his house that night that I would never hear from him again. To this day he has never once apologized or even accepted that what he did was wrong. I refused to go to his house, knowing that it would only make things worse for me, but he continued to call and text and even call my house phone and wake my parents. I couldn't take it anymore. I made the unfortunate decision to take 8 of my dad's Xanax and 25 Zyrtec, told him in a text, and passed out. I woke up in the hospital 24 hours later, and then finally came to at my house that next morning. I felt the same as I had the night I tried to commit suicide, so I told my parents and they took me to a psych ward. I was admitted for a week and realized that since he hit me I had been in a deep depression, which I thought was just "dealing with a bad breakup". After I got home, he preceded to call my house phone until I made my dad tell him to stop calling and just leave me alone. I continued seeing a therapist for the remaining weeks of summer and I have been on Prozac since June. I spent a lot of time with my family, doing yoga, surfing, and running. I felt amazing going back to school, like a whole new woman.

After two months of being back at school, I was told my multiple people that my ex-boyfriend was applying for transfer for this spring. For the next 3 months, my current boyfriend and I spent countless hours filing police reports, speaking to administrative directors, and writing letters to the president of our school explaining the situation and doing all we can to prevent him from coming back. I also applied to transfer for the spring, although I love my school and would never want to leave. I just knew that I could NOT go to the same school as him, he was too unpredictable. Within the next few weeks, he got in touch with me through text messages, e-mails, and Facebook. I blocked all of the above, so he started texting my roommate so she would tell me what he said.

I found out over Christmas break that he would not be coming back this semester, so I declined NYU and Wagner College of my transfer. There were rumors that he had been lying about transferring in the first place just to bother me, and although I don't doubt he is capable of something that insane, it was just an idea. I felt good about going back to school this spring and finally being able to move on and not worry about him.

It is now the second week of my spring semester of sophomore year, and I found out yesterday that my ex had said to a mutual friend of ours that "I was just lying about transferring, I just wanted to f*** with her." I had already convinced myself that him transferring was just a lie to bother me, but to hear that he was actually TELLING people his big scheme makes it all too real to me. I could spend all day telling you about all the psycho things he's done, and I don't use the word psycho loosely, I mean he REALLY has something wrong mentally.

Knowing that he spent so much time talking to mutual friends of ours that he was transferring makes me extremely scared. My boyfriend even said that he is now afraid, but mostly afraid for me. My ex is too smart to do something that could get him arrested, so there's really nothing that anyone can do but HOPE that he just moves on and leaves me alone. I am very scared though, terrified. He knows where I live at home, where I live at school, and the same goes for my boyfriend. He spent an ENTIRE semester putting together this big story about him coming back, just to scare me! Who knows what else he is capable of! He has severe anger issues and I'm pretty sure he's well on his way to alcoholism. I have all my contacts blocked from him, but that almost scares me more, that if he's sending me threatening texts or something then I'm just not getting them.

I have never hated someone so much in my entire life, and I've been ready to move on for a very long time now, but every time I think I'm ready he goes and does something to prove that he is completely out of his mind and still capable of hurting me, even from 400 miles away. I'm going to talk to my psychologist here at school about my anger towards him, but besides that, I think I've tried EVERYTHING else to move on.

I guess what I need is just advice, help figuring out what to do or what not to do. I just needed to vent to people that don't know either of us in hopes of getting new views on the situation.

Thanks so much and sorry this was so long, I'd appreciate ANY feedback.